Tag Archives: Christian

Introducing The Rylee Project

Posted in Books, Life, My Work by

Early in 2005, I suffered a devastating miscarriage.  One thing that has always bothered me is the fear that no one else would remember that baby.  Life—especially pre-born life—is treated so casually in this world that some do not even consider a miscarriage to be a death. Grieving over a miscarried child seems to be frowned upon.  More than once, I was told to pull myself together and get over it.  Even well-meaning Christian friends told me to let it go.

But that pregnancy was more than a blob of cells to me.  That was a baby, MY baby.  My daughter, a precious little part of my family.  We named her Rylee Adelle.  I don’t why God chose to keep her in Heaven.  But I do know that her loss is felt every day.  Not a day goes by when I don’t think about her, at least one time.  I’ve moved on with my life and I have learned how to live with the void her death has left in my heart.  But get over it?  Let it go?  Those are two things I can’t do, two things I won’t do.  That would mean forgetting her.

I don’t want to forget.

For seven years, I have wanted to do something to honor my little girl.  Just what I wasn’t sure what to do.  I wanted her brief existence to count for something.  I wanted her to touch others in some way, to make a difference in the world.

After a lot of thought and prayer, I think I have finally found the perfect way to do that!

The idea started this summer, when I began writing a series of letters to my daughter.  There are things that I would have loved to tell her, things that I would have taught her that don’t seem so important to teach my sons (like how to dress modestly and how to deal with your changing friendships as you get older.)  OK, so maybe they are things the boys need to know, too.  But I wouldn’t tell my boys exactly the same things that I would have told Rylee, at least not in the same way.  I began writing these letters, and they quickly turned into something more than I really expected.  The letters I wrote to her have made their way into a book, called LETTERS TO RYLEE.  (Expected publication date is November 23, 2012.  Keep an eye out for the cover, which I will unveil soon!)

One thing kept coming to mind as I wrote those letters—friendship.  And I don’t mean just human friendships.  I kept thinking about how important a friendship with Jesus is.  I didn’t understand how important that friendship really is when I was a teen.  Looking back on some of the things I did and the choices I made, I can’t help but wonder how different my life would be if I had really developed that friendship back then, instead of waiting until my 30’s to get around to it.

That is when The Rylee Project really began to take shape in my mind.  Through The Rylee Project, I am hoping to impact the lives of young girls today in a very positive way.  I want girls, especially girls who will one day date and eventually marry (yikes!) my sons, to have the tools to really develop a close friendship with Jesus.  It’s not about a particular religion, or the “rules” and “regulations” of being a Christian.  It’s more than that.  The Rylee Project is about developing a friendship with Jesus and developing human friendships that honor Him.  It’s about focusing not on what feels good now, but on what will have the most positive impact on life in the future.

It’s kind of a big job.  In all honesty, I don’t know if I am really qualified to tackle it.  But I keep going back to a saying I’ve seen all over Facebook in recent weeks—God doesn’t call the qualified; He qualifies the called.  As long as I follow His leading and keep Him in the center of what I am doing, I know this will work out.  I can’t focus on the grand dreams in my head, the things that would be amazing to see happen with The Rylee Project.  I can only focus on what God is asking me to do each day, and pray that I am a good example of the friendships He desires to see in this world.

Go ahead and take a look at the website for The Rylee Project.  The Rylee Project is also on Twitter and on Facebook (Hey, gotta go where the girls are!)  I look forward to hearing what you think about this project, especially those of you who have young girls.  Please visit and ask your daughters and their friends to visit.

And please, pray for this project.  If The Rylee Project can have a positive impact on just one young lady, than it has done all I have hoped for—honored God while honoring my Rylee Adelle.

THE EDGE OF GRACE, My Review

Posted in Authors, Books, Reviews by

An early morning call shatters Caryn Becker’s world.  Unable to cope with her brother’s news that he is gay, Caryn rejects him and disappears into her own turbulent like as a young widow and single mom.  But when David is attacked and nearly killed, Caryn is forced to make hard choices about family, faith and her own future; choices that take her to the very edge of grace.

To be totally honest, when I first heard that Christa Allan had a new book out, I didn’t care what the book was about.  She could have written 500 pages about watching paint dry or grass grow, and I would have wanted to read it.  OK, so that might be a bit of an exaggeration.  But I enjoyed her first book so much that I would have read The Edge of Grace no matter what topic it covered or how the plot twisted.  The first book was written in such a fluid, conversational style.  I had great hopes for the second.

And I was not disappointed.

The story really hit home for me (check out what I posted about it yesterday if you want to know why.)  Dealing with a gay family member can be very confusing, to say the least.  Caryn’s reaction to her brother’s was very real—“he’s doing something that I don’t approve of and can’t relate to, so I am just going to ignore him.”  Her attitude didn’t make the “problem” go away or turn back the clock to a time when she didn’t know that David was not happily in love with the woman he was planning to marry, but it did help Caryn to cope with the shock.  At least in the very beginning.  It was interesting to watch Caryn move from denial to acceptance, even though the metamorphosis meant changes in her own life and in her way of thinking.

The Edge of Grace was a very well-written story about a topic many Christians struggle with.  This book earns my highest recommendation.  I can’t say that I agree with all of the opinions expressed in this book, but that is OK.  At least reading it forced me to consider positions other than my own.

I think Caryn said it best herself in this speech to her brother near the end of the book: “And God is reaching me, maybe in very small steps, that He is the final judge, not me.  And that my job, for as long as I am here, is to reach out and love.”

That is something I think we all should keep in mind before we start hurling insults and accusations at one another.

Christa Allan is the author of Walking on Broken Glass and the mother of five.  Christa teaches high school English.  She and her husband, Ken, live in Abita Springs, Louisiana.  Visit Christa on the web at http://www.christaallan.com.